Wednesday 19th February, 2014.
I looked forward to this way too much, and set my expectations way too high.
Blackened Eyes are awesome.
I love our music, I love what we do, and so of course, naturally, I want everyone else to.
The winner of the final of this competition get a slot at Bloodstock Festival (where Megadeth are headlining), and get a chance to play in Germany and Slovakia, and loads of other cool stuff. Who wouldn't want this chance?
Two bands win each heat to get to the Quarter Finals.
So, I invited as many people as I could as it's 50% votes, and 50% judge vote. Despite the 100's I invited, of course only about 20 said they could come. 20 is a lot, and would pretty much secure a victory. However, 11 showed up - which is still a nice number of people, but 9 is a large amount of people not there, when you're counting on votes.
We arrived at the venue, quite nervous, to what you can probably imagine was quite a competitive atmosphere. The bands that night were bands I'd never heard of, so to me they were just competition.
As my friends started to arrive, our area at the venue was pretty full. The other areas in the venue seemed quite quiet, so it looked as though we had the most supporters. I began to get excited.
The first band played and put on a good show, but I didn't pay too much attention due to the building up nerves. I don't get nervous often, but when I'm being judged, and when there's a solid reason for playing (i.e to win the competition, rather than a ... non-solid reason(?) such as playing just for fun), I feel the pressure.
The band finished, and so we began to set up. I'd had a few beers at this point, and kept needing the toilet every five minutes. Just before we were about to play, I put my guitar down and ran to the toilet for a minute.
Nerves or beer? Both.
We played our normal set of four songs, (Days of Terror, Forgiven in Death, Farewell's Song and Scorn), and put on quite a good show. We had the energy, the nerves disappeared after the first song, and we were on form.
However, as I switched guitars for the second half of the set, for Farewell's Song, something went terribly wrong.
Before the gig, me and Dave agreed that from now on I'd take the opening solo to Farewell's Song. As we wanted to give a solid 30 minute set, we were to double the length of the intro so I could show off a bit more to try and score points for "Musicality".
He began the nice, acoustic introduction. I stepped forward, turned my guitar up and "EEERREHGHGHERHGHGHEGH", said the guitar.
Crap.
My input socket was playing up, and so over this quiet acoustic part, instead of a solo it was the loud noise you get when you try plugging your guitar in when drunk.
The only way I could stop it was by holding it in place with my right hand, but still the song continued, and so I had to solo with one hand.
I did alright, considering. I tried to stick to one string and perform many slow bends, and I kinda got away with it. But I wasn't happy. What should've been a beautiful solo to prove our range of dynamics was below a mediocre solo and ruined the mood.
Luckily, as the distortion kicked in, I found a spot on stage where the guitar worked - as long as I didn't move. But this meant less stage presence.
At the end of Scorn I shredded for about a minute as the cymbals and chords rang out - just to try and make up for Farewell's Song, and then held my guitar in the air.
The guitar got stuck in the netting above the stage. But it was more funny than serious, so it was okay.
We proceeded to sitting down in our places as the next bands played. We drank beer, and I tried to forget the Farewell's Song mishap.
Goat Leaf played - a rock band that have been going 20 years, and did really well, and they brought quite a lot of people as expected. So I thought, quite confidently, that they would win and so would we.
Everyone in our area said we were amazing and better than the other bands, that we were the "best metal band there". Perhaps bias, but I agreed with them - not just because it's my band, because it's my personal preference of music, that's why I'm IN this band.
My ego was building, I kept imagining: "And the winners are... Goat Leaf and... Blackened Eyes!" My heart raced every time I thought it.
Results Time.
No one got to actually see their results, their scores or anything. It would've been nice but there you go.
The man with the results took to the stage, and we all piled into the audience area.
"And the winners of tonight, in no particular order, are GOAT LEAF and NORMALISER!"
Dramatic, but it felt like everything stopped. I downed the remaining half coke and rum I had in my glass, and without looking at anyone, walked to my seat.
In hindsight, I went overboard with how angry I felt, how upset and disappointed I felt, but at the time it was real. This felt like my chance to make it with the band I love. When you feel like you can see more people in the building there to support you than not, when you feel like you put on the best metal performance, but you lose. All I kept thinking was: "My stupid bloody guitar". I was angry at everyone who said they'd come but didn't. I was angry at some of my best friends who didn't come for any given reason.
"I killed them all. Not just the men. I killed the women, and the children". - Anakin Skywalker.
(That quote is for humorous/dramatic effect. I didn't really kill anyone with that quote in mind.)
I just imagined us reaching a further stage in the competition, and how I could get us a great chance of winning by just inviting everyone I know to support me to reach my dreams of making it as a musician.
I'd help any of my friends reach their dreams if they knew how to do it and asked me to help them, so I naturally presume my friends will do the same.
Goat Leaf were great. Normaliser have even reached the Semi-Finals since. I had nothing against the bands, they were great guys, and by no means do we deserve to win this whole competition, but that's what competition is, right? You get passionate and defensive about it and you want the thing you love to become successful.
Take care,
ARK Walton.
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